You’ve got it all wrong about junkies
Published August 11, 2011 | 
Surprise! A post! But not just any post; this is more like a pretend post, which is far more exciting.
It may be useful to think of this post as complete trash, because trash happens to be the subject of another post I have blurted out at NAG’s website. That other post is less pretend and also features kittens, so in many ways it is far superior to this one.
Really, it’s about junk. You should care about junk – but step away from that ingrained bourgeois guilt! I’m not trying to make you recycle; I’m just trying to get you to overcome your prejudice and instil an appreciation of the inescapable pollution that chokes our world. You’d be amazed at the number of completely useless things you can make out of litter and industrial waste.
Just try to be a little bitter and closed-minded for once, OK? It’s the secret to appreciating those other times.
