review

Dungeons of Dredmor 2011-07-26 11-12-07-60

I told you I’d be back with a thought expansion on the topic of Dungeons of Dredmor. I just didn’t tell you I’d be posting those bigger, better thoughts on G3AR. But it’s true, and I just did.

It’s a beastly, beastly game, and I love loathe love it to the very depths of its foul, slick soul. I just hate all diggles and spit on their impotent shadows. Gaslamp Games, you made trouble for yourself when you invented diggles. How many death threats do you get per diem, on average? I can assure you that at least more than half of them are not from me.

Right then, glad to have got that off my chest. I think I’ll just give Dred one mor go.

Cthulhu Saves the World ScreenshotI have subjected the readers of G3AR to some more judgmental thoughts, this time about Cthulhu Saves the World. Some of these thoughts are kindly, but not in the same way that elderly women who want to feed the world are kindly. They’re the more selfish kind of kindly and are entirely involved with my enjoyment and satisfaction.

The other thoughts are less kindly, but not in the same way that elderly women who wear gas masks and dress in crotchless vinyl are less kindly. They’re the more bored kind of less kindly. Continue reading

Oh man, when interactive fiction is done right it’s sublime.

This morning I played Speculative Fiction, an IntroComp 2011 entry I think I should have left to last, because now it’s done and I’m oozing towards a depressive state.

But really, for once I have nothing to complain about. Aside from a few nano-niggles, Speculative Fiction is a transfixing study in Doing Things Right. Continue reading

IntroComp is like like lap dancing. That is to say, IntroComp is all about being a tease, and being a tease is all about revealing just enough, and not too much.

Or not too little.

About that. I’ve just played through The Despondency Index, IntroComp 2011′s entry number something. I’m using the term “played through” in the most diaphanous of ways, actually, because The Despondency Index is not so much a snippet of interactive fiction as a snippet of underactive fiction. Continue reading

When I hear the word “bender” I instantaneously think of the pleasant alcoholic blackouts of my fragile youth.

I do not think of supernatural powers involving the unfair treatment of earth and water, but such is life. And such, apparently, is the nature of Bender, the second IntroComp 2011 entry I’ve chosen to review. Continue reading


Yesterday I nobly took up the cause of reviewing games for IntroComp 2011, an interactive fiction competition in which non-linear-ish writers do the dogfight for prize money with introductory builds of games they’re working on. Anybody, even us foreigners, can post a score indicating how much they want to see a game finished to the competition’s grand overseer, Jacqueline Ashwell.

The first intro I chose to splutter about in was Chunky Blues, whose title grasped at my face like a blind wino in the throes of an emotional outbreak. Continue reading

I’m a slut for cuteness. Give me half a chance (and the correct tools) and I’ll etch Hello Kitty’s outline into every tooth I can reach.

I’m especially prone to cute robots. Unlike their mammary-beglanded counterparts, they don’t need to be housebroken, you can tinker around inside them without getting your hands covered in blood, and it is much simpler to attach flame throwers and pulse rifles to their body parts.

So it is not terribly shocking, then, that the sight of Celestial Mechanica – with its triple posthypnotic suggestion of things cute, robotic and Metroidvanic – reduced me to a drooling state of automatic consumer obedience. Continue reading